May 15, 2003:
Voters:Last week's winner was: "In order to make sure the grades reported are as accurate as possible, there are strict procedures--many of which resemble those of fascist regimes--..." -Mr. Weisman, administering the Spanish AP
This email is being sent out late (and the date is for last Thursday instead of Sunday) because I was (along with the rest of Commonwealth school) in Maine all weekend. Apologies to other commies, but Hancock quotes will not be included in QOTW. There were just too many to keep track of.
How to vote: List as many of the nominees below as you wish in order from favorite to least favorite. List only nominee names, not the entire quote, being sure to distinguish somehow between two quotes from the same person.
And now, the NOMINEES:
"Mr. Labute, we must inform you that you have grossly misinterpreted your own play." -Jenn, on the disappointing film adaptation of the play 'The Shape of Things'
"Ben, I'm renaming you Archibald. Don't worry, it'll only last as long as my attention span." -Julian
"Dirty in more ways than one." -Mr. Wharton, on the couch in the Commonwealth lobby
"Even if you're frustrated, don't molest the 7-foot by 7-foot crossword puzzle." -Mr. Weisman
"If people don't sign up for your activity, it doesn't mean people don't
like you. People do like you. I like you." -Mr. Conolly, on Hancock activities
"Math may be a religion, but computers is a cult." -Miller
"It's like a coca cola ad. A really long coca cola add." -Kate, on NBC's 'American Dreams'
"Orgies." -Mr. Merill, founder of the Commonwealth school, gesturing towards the couch in the Commonwealth lobby
"You could have it so that you can add a transparent red circle and a transparent blue circle together and get green. Or something like that. I don't know my color wheel very well..." -Paul, brainstorming a program to create in computers class
"We have a long tradition in society of dividing life into public and private spheres. There's a wonderful invention called a door." -Mr. Wharton, addressing the sophomores' publicly erotic behavior
Voting ends at 5:00 on Thursday. This week's batch of Honorable Mentions is especially excellent, so join the Honorable Mentions Club (no extra charge; regional restrictions may apply).
-Ben "coyness is my shield; indifference, my dagger" Orlin
May 15, 2003: Honorable Mentions
The winner this week was "We have a long tradition in society of dividing life into public and private spheres. There's a wonderful invention called a door." -Mr. Wharton, addressing the sophomores' inappropriate behaviorThe HONORABLE MENTIONS:
"That would make one kickass video game." -John, on dogs playing baseball
"Grady looks a little more constipated than usual." -John, on the Red Sox losing 8-1. Grady Little is the Red Sox' manager.
"No, I don't smoke Latin." -Joanna
"Ben, you're not man enough to wear glasses." -Reilly, to Miller
"For many of you, the production department seems to have--as they say--tanked." -Mr. Davis, addressing his Short Story class
"Wait, are you equating Emily to the Western Front?" -Josh, to Julian
"It would be really funny to se a dog charge the mound. He could bite Clemens in the leg or something, and even if he got suspended, you could just get another dog." -John, on the advantages of putting a dog on a baseball team
"I think some chrysanthemums would be suiting." -John, after the Red Sox got two quick outs down by three runs in the ninth inning
"Ay, they call him Womanizing Weisman." -Joanna, on Mr. Weisman
"They grow nanotubes? That's really cool. Do they have to water them and stuff?" -Teddy, on carbon nanotubes
"I'm going to talk about sex again, because it came up at a teachers' meeting a few days ago." -Mr. Wharton
"The final scene's going to be the director saying, 'Your name's not Neo, it's Keanu Reeves, and here's a sack of money.'" -Mr. Weisman, on the third Matrix film, after seeing the second one
"Don't worry, I'm not throwing the BOW out the window..." -Miller, picking up Joanna near an open window
"I'm sorry, the forties are not a viable decade." -Jenn
"Who checks the credit of a king?" -Becky, on Medieval banks giving bad loans to French kings in the 14th century and going bankrupt as a result
"I just realized the [dance] YMCA emphatically does not work with one arm. Imagine the poor amputees..." -Becca
"If other people see me drinking from it, they'll think I'm easy." -Roz, on a 'slutty' North Station water fountain
-QOTW Management
