October 19, 2003:
Shut up and listen:So it's 15 minutes before midnight and I'm VERY tired because I have stayed up to do all this Quote of the Week stuff. I hope you're happy because I'm too sleepy to think of anything but a caramel macciato.
In happier news that does not involve my sleep habits, Frederique won last week's little battle of how-long-Micheline-can-pay-attention with her quote "And they're coming during passover, so if you're Jewish you can take them to temple! What an exciting experience for people whose ancestors kicked out the Jews! It could be vengeance." - Frederique, on hosting Spanish exchange students. Congrats to Frederique and kudos to those who make sure this actually happens. Although I'm not sure you'll get them to step through the door of the temple unless you're dragging them...wait, that was mean. I'm sorry. No I'm not. I'm too brain-dead to care.
Anyways, on the nominees, but first a side note. You'll notice the Honorable Mentions (when it comes out) contains some very funny quotes. I'm sorry to say it was very hard to pick only ten and some nominee-worthy ones had to be pushed aside. So, here you go:
"Don't try this at home kids. It's all fun and games until someone gets poked in the eye and then it's fun you can't see." - The Whip Boy at King Richard's Faire
"It is not that the world comes in threes, it is that we arrange it in threes.and after 3 years of Philosophy in college you'll understand what the hell I'm talking about." - Mr. Young
"Yeah, someone you can kick on the side." - Becky, on being Mike's sidekick.
"Team Spirit." - Becca in response to "Who are the soccer gods and what form does their wrath take?"
"Just remember, no matter how ugly you may be, how spastic, how moronic... no matter how much of an asshole, or how inept you may be... even Hitler had a girlfriend." - Josh Stroh
"If you have carneys at a carnival, shouldn't you have fairies at a fair?" - Roz
"Humor just isn't humour without the 'u.' Oh, wait; yes, it is...." - Andrea Lam
"Well, I'd say 'team' is a strong word ... but there IS fencing." - Reed college representative, on sports at Reed
"It's not hazing, it's free love." - Harry Alper, not related to Kate Alper
"It's so hard to look at the bright side when the dark side is so apparent." - Dewey
Well, that was fun, wasn't it. And to all those who don't know what the honorable mentions are, they are an extra bundle of funny quotes that aren't as funny as the nominees, or so I hope. I probably sound very bitter throughout this e-mail, so I'll end on a light note. ::LIGHT NOTE::
~Micheline "Just because I'm short doesn't mean you can steal my pillow" Heal
October 19, 2003: Honorable Mentions
Enjoy!"Eventually I will kick [that wire] and break my nose. and I will sue the school." - Mr. Riahi
"You ODed on Gatorade!" - Larry, to James Palmer
"I'm from New York. Somehow, I was pulled into rooting for the Red Sox, against my natural instincts. I feel dirty now." - Mr. Conolly
"It's not a lobotomy, it's a stab to the head. Lobotomies are more thought out... or they should be." - Julian
"This door needs serious psychological help." - Roberto Poli, on the door to his apartment
"We just lost another one." - Mr. Young after some visitors witnessed him dropping a chair
"No one failed; everyone is getting into college. Except Alex." - Ms. Jackman on an Organic Chemisty test. Alex is the only junior in Orgo.
"Don't you find it funny that in lines of poetry the meter of a line is measured in feet?" - Miller
"Stop the finger fencing." - Becky
"It's always good to talk about cleavage." - Ms. Jackman on Oxidative Cleavage in Organic Chemistry
"Then we must forge ahead without Ben or Mariah.and when Ben comes in I'll throw a marker at him or something." - Mr. Young
"Joanna, we're just barely nerdy boys." - Dewey
"I'll be fine by lunch, I just need to mourn for a little while." - Kominsky, on the red sox loosing the playoffs
"1492/Columbus sailed the ocean blue/and Spain kicked out the Muslims and the Jews." - Mr. Young
"Chalkboards are going to be antique in 15 years - you heard it here first guys." - Orlin
"[The couch] is like the Chanukah story; it was supposed to go away, but it's not." - Gabe
"It's slightly masochistic fresh breath." - Roz
"Be careful with whom you snuggle. Remember: you're snuggling with everyone they've snuggled with before." - Miller
"I don't like phones. They're so... phony. Oh! Yes! Boo yah!" - Daniel
"Have I ever wronged you? No. So you can't say that all your friends are bastards. Now stop talking shit about them behind their backs when they're not around to be insulted by it." - Josh Stroh
"It's great when you bomb places - you actually learn where they are." - Ms. Grant
"In regular math this is called a discontinuity. Here, I will accept the term 'hole.'" - Mr. Phillips
"I would find Reilly's fake accent offensive, if only I knew what planet it was from." -Orlin
"Hey, pal, too much hair. Gay guys would take that off in a second." - Roz's dad, to Damon, imagining him on the show Queer Eye for the Straight Guy
"Growing boys are now very fond of lesbians." - Exhibition debater from Hotchkiss
And now for your conversational pleasure:
"I'm a little worried about how behind we are." - Mr. Young
"But we're miles ahead of the other class!" - Joanna
"But we're miles behind the rest of the universe." - Mr. Young
You'll notice that there are a lot and in the most recent website update, I discourage a lot of Honorable Mentions. Let's just say I was feeling benevolent, and catagorizing them seemed like a lot less work than trying to cut them down. Until next time,
~Micheline "the management" Heal
