May 2, 2004:
Dearest darling QotW subscribers,Hail, and welcome to the latest edition of your friendly, minion-run Quote of the Week! Wine and cheese will be served shortly, and hors d'oeuvres are in the grand ballroom. If you happen not to like little bits of sheep intestine speared onto crackers (literally), blame Mr. Green in the kitchen with the double-headed axe. The prom's made him gone a bit mental.
In other news, last week's winner was Lydia Rivera-Abrams, with her English-teacher-defying quote of "I would suggest that after months and years of pointing to the obvious-signaling to the elephant in the middle of the living room-and turning over backwards to keep a constructive ethical tone while observing others who use guerilla warfare to score, one feels the need to stand in the middle of the road and loudly state that the proverbial king has no clothes on!" Roz gets special recognition for finding all six mixed metaphors; bother him if you want to find out. Sorry, Alex-you nearly won. Maybe if you worked for the Winchester Star...?
Here. Have some nominees:
"You can't run a campaign on the slogan 'just as capable as Orlin.'" - Nora to Roz, on the race for student rep
"No, I put the 'F U' in Fun[damentals of Physics]." - John Oliverio, in response to the charge that he puts the "Fun" in "Fundamentals of Physics"
"They married their sisters, so, like, Cain married Cainette...." - Daniel Thal, learning the Founder Effect
"I've already done that a few times. See that light brown patch? That's part of my scalp." - Jenny Oberholtzer, knitting
"Hear that? That's the sound of George Orwell spinning in his grave." - Jon Kominsky, on Lydia d'Winchester
"And then the cows marched on New Jersey." - Andrea Lam's Aunt Pat
"I know; I was just thinking, and your head was in the way." - Zoë Stachel
"I'm so pro-choice I think there should be mandatory abortions." - Jeff
"He looks like a Black & Tan." - Andrea Lam's Aunt Joy, describing a family guinea pig (a Black & Tan is a kind of beer)
"Also fighter jets." - Wesley, on what to get Mr. Harsanyi's child
Voting ends this Friday evening at 5 PM EST. I mean, come on, people! Get those fingers typing and *vote!* If you've forgotten how, go here: http://www.qotw.net/~qotw/howtovote.html Don't make me resort to spruikers... Also, sign up for the Honourable Mentions e-mail. Unlike dresses on Newbury Street, it never goes out of style.
--Andrea "mortals have not been our study" Lam
May 2, 2004: Honorable Mentions
Did someone say "Honourable Mentions"? Yes, you did. Don't try and deny it...."Jesus saves! Passes to Moses! GOOOAL!" - Paul Cavallero
"You look like a FROG!" - Jenny Oberholtzer, to Paul Cavallero
"Let's all play 'Catch the Athena'!" - the sophomores
"They're specially adapted to the cold. They don't talk." - Jenny Oberholtzer, on Minnesotans
"Yeah, this is like Wendy's-unlimited refills!" - Andrea Lam's Uncle John, slightly inebriated
"...and the cows were incest...." - Andrea Lam's Aunt Pat (she meant to say "incensed")
"I had a dream about you...being a homicidal maniac." - Conor Detwiler, to Andrea Lam
"Yeah, but if you created a little sperm rocket...." - Evan McGonagill, on triple pregnancies
"Do that again and I'll tree you." - one small child to another
"So the Dwarf with a thing...the Dwarf with a Ring...the thing with a ring?" - Andrea Lam's Aunt Joy, mixed up
"But he's so PREETY!" - Andrea Lam's Aunt Joy, being immature
"And then Paris runs off with Achilles and Helen gets together with Priam and Odysseus just builds...he just builds a big ship." - random guy in Harvard Square, "explaining" *The Iliad* to his friend (he was completely serious)
"A Tale of Two Kitties: Don't Let Your Cats Breed Like the Dickens." - a bumpersticker
--Andrea "never laugh at a live dragon" Lam
