February 22, 2004:
Halloa!I intend this e-mail to be much more cheerful than my last one seeing as I am in a very bouncy mood (If you want to know why, go ask Miles. Eww... no you pervy hobbit fancier). If you haven't visited the Quote of the Week in a long time, I'd highly recommend you go and see the new layout. The website is having a graphics contest and winner recieves a batch of Lily's fudge! (yes, I know it's a shameless plug but we worked hard on it! My minions have blisters on their fingers from all of the copying and pasteing!). You should also visit if you've forgotten how to vote. And without further ado, this weeks winner is (dun dun DUN)... Mr. Phillips with his proclomation of morbidity, "If I throw you out the window, you would be flailing and everything, but your center of mass would fall nicely like a stone."
The nominees this week are:
"Let me put it this way, Evan: if someone cut you open with a knife and removed some of your organs, would you really feel better if they told you that it would mean less little homeless kids running around?" - Tanner, on neutering pets
"You're right, any dumbo could do it, but I want you dumbos to do it." - Mr. Phillips
"We talk about manifest destiny: [the Mexican-American] war was manifest destiny with a vengeance." - Mr. Young
"You see, Micheline, we must not take advantage of mathematical advancements. We have to go through in the historical order so we can feel the pain our ancestors felt." - Julian
"Bad things happen to people who are too neat." - Mr. Davis
"Let me introduce a new teaching method. It is called 'make students say things that amuse me.' Let's begin with a role-playing game." - Mr. Young
"Mr Sherry, your «Quizzes» are like wolves in sheep's clothing, except the sheep's clothing is really wolf's clothing. Died black." - Haselkorn
"It's ok, Josh. I don't actually intend on reading any of your answers. The good news is, you don't have to study." - Sherry
"If you have not signed up for a museum by 2:40 today, I am taking a group to Weston to the Postal Art museum. We will look at stamps for 4 hours , then I think we'll go to Rhett's house for a 'safe party'." - Mr. Wharton. He refers to the "safe house form" which a group of overanxious parents sent around for other parents to sign, agreeing to have certain regulations at parties.
"Oh God! Gouge my eyes out with a dirty, rusty spoon!" - Garrison
Now go put thine mouse over the reply button and vote!
Micheline "I got paid for dancing. I feel like a cheap whore." Heal
February 22, 2004: Honorable Mentions
Other quotes I liked:"But at least it's a cool name, unlike 'Supervixen' or 'Bobo' or 'Ivan'." - Norris Wong, on the name Graham
"So, it turns out it's illegal to kill people." - Farrar Cooper
"Plagiarism is the soul of wit." - Julian
"His wife might be the only one on the planet fitter than he is." - Curt Schilling on Nomar Garciaparra's new bride, soccer star, Mia Hamm
"Psychotherapy can help." - Andrea Lam
"He has a father? Mel Gibson has a father?" - Mr. Davis
".Wash your hands, don't eat gum off the sidewalk, blah blah blah..." - Evan, giving advice on how to stay healthy
"You may forget everything I've said today and you will turn back to your notes and the world will seem ordered because you've put it in a chart." - Mr. Young on using charts in class
"The moment of truth.dammit!" - Paul
"I wonder what else she's been doing that I don't know about." - Mr. Davis after discovering his wife had made cookies without his knowledge.
"Couldn't think of a worse thing to happen to somebody." - Mr. Young on turning into John C. Calhoun
"You're like locusts, except you're worse because you're sophomores." - Matt Kraning, to the class of 2006 (not 2005 for once)
"It's like when you beat you wife; she still loves you." - Luc, in English class
"They look like teeth. Baby teeth." - Davis on Nerds (candy)
"Wouldn't you say it's kind of ironic that aliens have to get green cards?" - Kraning on foreigners.
"You may wipe your nose on Josh [Kreiger's] sleeve." Davis, to Isaac
"I am a pacifist and afraid of weapons." - Mr. Riahi
"We start out on the savannahs with a life expectancy of 26 and now we eat this synthetic crap and live till 80. Now if that's not an inspiring story." - Mr. Young on synthetic foods
"Bored? Already? At least wail till halfway through the class to be bored." - Mr. Young after Copans yawned.
And now for your conversational pleasure (oh won't Orlin be embarrassed):
"Instead of saying 'god damn fucking class' they'd say god damn class of shit." - Mike, on Spanish vs. Mexican swears.
"That gives me an idea for Computers!" - Ben Orlin, in response. Mike was referring to java classes.
Micheline "sorry I'm shedding all over you" Heal
